…Kulaks to conquer, Kulaks to enslave in Clay, property to plunder…
THIS JUST IN!!
A mysterious beam has been focused on Earth’s citizens. It is sucking the wealth out of people! The ray is said to be coming from the dead planet Marx. But wait. Professor Zharkov had miscalculated. The deadly beam is coming from the planet Ruling Class.
It seems that there is a new emperor in town: Marx the Ideologically Merciless! And he is using a powerful integrated Collectivist Ray against the people of earth. The deadly Supreme Socialist Ray or SSR is focused directly on Earth’s citizenry and right on their property. The citizens of earth are fleeing, taking their possessions and hoping not to feel the burn.
I am being told that the wicked Queen Hillary Azura has formed a partnership with the evil emperor Marx the Merciless on planet Ruling Class. This witch’s powers include the ability to transmute people into figures of living clay, condemning them to live in darkened caves. She is hated and feared by the country class.
Marx the Merciless has also allied himself with other nefarious characters and groups: the Red Hammer of Sanders organization, the unscrupulous Queen Rubia E. Warren, BHO the shape shifter and the Carnage Corporation. With his life altering ray focused directly on you, Marx the Merciless hopes that “individual economic actions and individual property, rights will be altered and abridged” forever.
—Reporting for the Daily Altoid, this is Happy Hapgood’s daughter Snappy Hapgood.
(Snappy has video of the Ruling Class Planet’s attack on the Country Class Planet and the valiant efforts being made to stop Marx the Merciless in his tracks…)
“In any event the Commission is convinced by its interpretation of available empirical data that the actually integrating economy of the present day is the forerunner of a consciously integrated society, in which individual economic actions and individual property, rights will be altered and abridged.”
“Conclusions and Recommendations for the Social Studies, Carnegie Corporation, 1934.”
The Supreme Socialist Ray’s unearthly effects are being directed at your children in the classroom…
“8. Under the molding influence of socialized processes of living, drives of technology and science, pressures of changing thought and policy, and disrupting impacts of economic disaster, there is a notable waning of the once widespread popular faith in economic individualism; and leaders in public affairs, supported by a growing mass of the population, are demanding the introduction into economy of ever wider measures of planning and control.
9. Cumulative evidence supports the conclusion that, in the United States as in other countries, the age of individualism and laissez faire in economy and government is closing and that a new age of collectivism is emerging.“
Earth must find a way to destroy Marx’s Socialist ray before the Earth is doomed!!!